I'm also looking for advice on how to detach. This is BY FAR the hardest part for me. There have not been any ILYs or kisses hello/goodbye (mostly...with one or two odd exceptions) since May 3rd.
He has a lot going on in his family right now. His grandmother is dying (no one in his family is very fond of her) and his sister is nearing the end of her high-risk pregnancy.... he is inevitably going to have to travel 6-8 hours in the next few weeks for a funeral and/or a birth. Before this year, I know we would do nearly anything possible to make the trip together with our kids. I told him on the phone today that whenever "things" happen, if he wants me to go to the funeral with him, I can make it happen or if he wants to go alone I can make it happen too. I then said I would like to go to meet the new baby if it's possible. Later this evening when we were both off work we had a decent convo about grandparents in general and I said I had been thinking and that whatever happens in the next couple weeks, he needs to do what he needs to do for his family and not to let my schedule interfere with his travels (meaning I'm going on my own trip at the end of the month and not to let my being out of town stop him from going). It was heartbreaking for me to say that, as I do want to be there after the baby is born, but I thought this was one way to detach....To let him be there for his family no matter what my feelings about the matter are. Am I correct in this?
M:39 H:39 S/15, S/11 (both adopted in 2004, my step-nephews, now our kids) M10, T13 Multiple bombs. Latest one 5/4/12, our 10th anniversary. Still living together and sharing a bed up until 7/18/12.
