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[bustorama]

I helped my little ones get cards for their mom on her birthday.

I didn't get her anything myself or otherwise acknowledge her birthday through a text, email or phone call (I was in NC with her by this point). She later told me that she definitely felt the loss of her birthday passing without any acknowledgment of it from me and without me there.

I may be on the fringe with this perspective, but, act as if you were 10 years divorced. Would you send your 10-year ex a greeting? (some people would, some people wouldn't). Do whichever seems natural to you, but do not do it with the expectation that it will draw her to you or keep her from drifting farther away.