But... it IS something significant in your journey.
And isn't it amazing how the little things we took for granted - like going to a meeting of this sort with H, or whatever it is - take on so much import now.
My H actually brought a cup of tea that I'd made for myself from the kitchen into the lounge room where I was sitting and handed it to me tonight (he was visiting to help D16 with homework).
And I nearly fell off my chair. What a massive step forward that was in our relationship (and how sad that it means that much to me).
So glad to hear that you are going to these meetings.
If it helps at all with the 'no expectations' perspective, here's the chorus of a song I use as the soundtrack to my attempts to survive. You have to imagine the music to get the full, mojo-pumping effect (Titanium, David Guetta):
I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose Fire away, fire away Ricochet, you take your aim Fire away, fire away You shoot me down but I won't fall I am titanium You shoot me down but I won't fall I am titanium I am titanium I am titanium
