bustingout - so sorry to hear that you found out more details. that's always a really unsettling time.
I think you have a good head on your shoulders and your plan to be distant but friendly is properly DB.
In this situation, it may help you to think of H's problems as "her" problems for now - you don't need to go out of your way to assist him with any issues he's having. I agree with the note above to let him understand what life without you will be like. By the way - there's no way "she" knows more about your H than you do, though. Even if she knows the recent stuff. She just doesn't. You have the power there.
bustingout - so sorry to hear that you found out more details. that's always a really unsettling time.
I think you have a good head on your shoulders and your plan to be distant but friendly is properly DB.
In this situation, it may help you to think of H's problems as "her" problems for now - you don't need to go out of your way to assist him with any issues he's having. I agree with the note above to let him understand what life without you will be like. By the way - there's no way "she" knows more about your H than you do, though. Even if she knows the recent stuff. She just doesn't. You have the power there.
UKVA, verab....thank your support and words. About to leave to the airport in a few hours and really feeling the physical anguish throughout me right now.
I just need to get through this. This first step.
I think I am really starting to understand how long and hard this road is going to be. Because honestly I feel like just running! But this will take seasons I realise. Not to fix the M necessarily ( if that even happens) but to fix me. To get through this wiser stronger better and happier.
The kids are excited to see daddy. So I will use that as my focus right now. To make sure I don't fall into my old habits of sulking, being a cow, or looking desperate and sad.
Thank you again. You are all in my heart. Talk to you soon.
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
We will be thinking about you bustingout and wishing you well. I think you are stronger than you realize and this trip may very well prove that to you! Have a mantra to remember like "cool, calm, confident" ((( )))
Me(f): 51 W: 41 DP:8 M:3 T:10 "W not happy" 7/11 D final: 8/13
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
