Wow Brooklyn Mum .... you remind me of those 50s TV shows, where 2 people are having a conversation, discussing 2 completely different things.

He wants a meeting with a lawyer. You agreed. As far as he's concerned, you did what you always do - you agreed to go along with him, with one of your whiny, controlling, I know better than you do what's best for you and us so you have to do something I want as well.

Why wouldn't he go along with it? He's used to it. Depending on his pattern, he may or may not go to the meetings, but it doesn't matter, because unless someone is open to healing and changing you can sit through dozens of therapy sessions, 12 step programs etc and not self reflect one bit (I'm well qualified to speak on that subject).

Of course he wants to improve communication - he hates the current conflict - he wants to separate in an amicable way. He's like, "sheesh, she wants me to go to a 12 step program (shaking his head) whatever, if that's what it takes, that's what it takes" ... nothing more

DBing suggests 180s for a reason.

Take it easy ... the sooner you turn your focus away from your H and getting him to do things to fix himself and therefore your marriage and on to you - and what you can do to build your life, so that you'll be OK no matter what your H decides to do ... the sooner you'll start to feel better and start healing yourself, and then possibly your relationship with your H.

Take care, V (())

V

Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.