Thank you. I am going to try my best to control myself. I'm going to smile. He used to always ask me to smile, and I'd always so no. Why should I force it? I was never happy, but deep down, I was happy. I just never showed it. I'm going to now. I'm going to cook the food I want to eat. I'm going to clean up when something is a mess. I am not going to talk about the relationship we have or don't have. I'm going to annoy or pester or pressure him.
I want to go to the library next week and get a library card and read. I want to go to the gym at least twice a week. I want to go hiking on Tuesday evening. I am getting together with various friends after work throughout the week. I am going to see what classes I can take to keep myself busy. A friend invited me into Brooklyn on the weekend to hang out.
I have things to do for myself.
Marriage counseling is Wednesday night, so I am looking forward to that, but I am nervous.
