So I saw your previous post about how you weren't sure what to do.

This really jumped out at me:

Quote:
but my mind is flip flopping.


All of your posts seem very frantic and upset. That's perfectly normal. I understand how you feel because I was there. I was a WAW as well and then a few months later he found someone that he was very happy moving on with.

They say Believe none of what they say and half of what they do. So all his calling you wifey no matter what he says or texts....the facts are he is still in a R with someone else and there were valid reasons you left the marriage.

You can a) let your anger validate you into filing for divorce and leaving the sitch for good
b) continue to pursue him putting up with whatever crumbs he may give you
or
C) decide that this time is a gift like Cadet says. Be still center yourself, decide what it is you want in a R whether with him or someone else. What you have done to contribute to the breakdown to the M, work on yourself and work on a functioning R with H because you will be in each other's lives forever with the kids.

The truth is there is no quick fix and just because it worked for someone else doesn't mean it will work for you. If you are committed to doing everything you can to have a better M in the future whether that's with H or someone else, then you need to stick to one thread, post often, answer everyone's questions because they are here to help you self analyze and they will tell you when your thoughts are helpful or harmful. If no one is answering then post just to journal and vent put it all here, not in letter or texts to your ex.

Look through the archives and read others who are going through the same thing.

Set boundaries that will keep you emotionally and mentally safe.

Do you want to save your marriage or do you want to punish him for having a relationship?

As a WAW I had to sit down with myself and understand that I was being selfish in wanting all of this to happen on my timeline. To want space when I wanted it and want the R when I wanted it.

We think that by cutting the spouse out of our life it will end the pain. It won't. you have to make yourself happy, you have to heal the hurts with in. It takes patience and time and work. Do you want to do that?