I read Divorce Remedy. The library in the place I'm visiting didn't have Divorce Busting. I just feel lost. What am I going to do when I get back there? I can't imagine anything having an effect. His mom insists that there is still a glimmer of hope, but I can't imagine how, if he is this dead set on ending it.
Like, what do I do when I get home? Normally, I want to talk about the relationship. All the time. Obviously I can't want to do this. I'm kind of just thinking I need to just not initiate any conversation, although, what do I do if he speaks pleasantly to me, like, "how was your trip?" Do I just say, "I had a good time, thanks? How was your week?" I just don't know. What if he wants to talk about our relationship? He is going to have to at some point, since we have to figure out finances, cars, pets, etc. We have to know if he's moving back to Australia sooner (and if that's the case, Divorce Busting will make NO difference whatsoever). Do I just agree, and say, "you're right. This needs to happen. Let's figure this out." And act calmly? I mean, I am really emotional and can't see doing this without crying at least a little bit. I do certainly know that I can go out and be more independent and do things to not be in the apartment with him, which I guess is a big change. I guess I'm just not sure how to interact.
I've been having dreams, every single night about him. About having fun and doing things together, and when I wake up, it hits hard. We have so many good memories, and honestly, I thought that overall our marriage was pretty good. Nothing groundbreaking or earth shattering has happened, other than us disagreeing on how to communicate. It seems like something a counselor could help us through, if he would just come with me. But I won't pressure anymore.
