For the kids, I just want them to be as happy as they can be given the circumstances. They need to see their Mom and their Dad. When I let go of my need for structure and planning things are a whole lot simpler, and things will work out fine.
How do you get there ??
I don't want you to think I am asking you to move on, because that is the furthest thing from what I would ask you to do.
Would I be correct in thinking that you are only seeing things in Black and White ? That it has to be one way or another ?
I would like for you to think in terms of moving forward, for your self instead of moving on. Moving on sounds so final, and unapproachable. It sounds like you are done with things, and are actively seeking the next phase of your life, while throwing away the years that you have invested. Not a pleasant thought...
How many years were you married ?
What your spouse is gong through...what can you imagine that looking like ? From her perspective ?
I don't usually ask a poster to get too inside of their spouses head here, although I would like to hear what you think is happening...
As far as planning, I think that in this process, things tend to not , just work out.
I would advise you to try to separate the marital side of this, from the legal side of this for now. Protecting what is best should be number one for you. From what I am reading, it is.
You should protect your Children, Home, and Finances. That is way different from the marriage for now.
Maybe start with a plan for that. The rest will play out as it will. Don't let a fear of the marriage stop you from doing what is right.
I am going to ask Cadet to stop by with some resource links for MLC. I'm not saying she is or isn't. Although I would like you to at least read.
