Wow, thanks for being honest. In writing it out, were you able to appreciate your wife's side of this?

When there was little physical intimacy and you posted on the adult site, were you talking to your wife about how you were feeling? You've probably figured out, or read, that men and women see and experience sex very differently. Did you try to work on those issues?

Have you read How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It? The 5 Love Languages might also give some insight.

Good luck, this is a long slow process. Read old threads, when you find posters who resonate with you, search out other posts by them. You will find a ton of knowledge and help here.

Call and talk to your kids when you feel you want to. Don't call to talk to your wife. She doesn't want to talk to you now. Be a great father to your kids.

Other than you issues with fidelity, what other complaints does your W have about you?

What do you know you need to change?

What are you doing to change?

How are you GAL?

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss