So CV, that's why I kept telling you to focus more on yourself, build your own foundation. Focus less on his shortcomings, take them less personally. Work on you. You don't want to leave him yet, so why not make things nicer while you're there? For YOU.
I feel like I'm circling back around to the beginning of my posts, maybe for the second time around. The question is what would that look like? For me it's sleeping in the other bedroom; for H, it's the same bed. For me, it's not sitting next to him at dinner or not even going out to dinner with him; for him, it's going, sitting next to him, and letting him eat off my plate. For me, it's being able to make my own decisions about things; for him, it's me doing exactly what he wants regardless of my own feelings.
I can either invest in me or invest in us. There doesn't seem to be a cross-over.
