You asked me this on hopingandpraying's thread -- I'll answer here so I don't threadjack:
Originally Posted By: jks
Accuray, are you thinking about leaving your W???
JKS, I'm not happy. My W basically acts like someone who loves me, but is not in love with me. I've been trying to accept that by lowering my expectations, but it's not working for me. All of the "professional help" that I've sought basically boiled down to the fact that W is not going to do the work, so I either accept things as they are, or leave.
From my perspective, W can't will herself to be "in love" with me, and the lack of that emotion discourages her from stepping up to work with me on the marriage. She wants to do just enough to keep things going, but the minimum is no longer enough for me.
I feel that I've really been trying, I don't have any regrets. I'm going to give it one more shot -- I'm going to try the MarriageBuilders program and see if that works for me. If it doesn't, I'll re-evaluate. But yes, in answer to your question, I've been having WAS thoughts, I'm tired of being unhappy.
Accuray
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
