Hi Bill - Good on you that you did what you wanted without expectations!! This is something I'm learning to do too.
And, that your W didn't get you a card is - as you say - fine. I can pretty much assure you she felt a bit bad about it, particularly when you presented her with one. Hopefully, it will be back on track for next year's celebration.
I totally agree with you counsellor that you have become an assertive, positive person - and this is clearly the change your marriage needed of you to get yourselves to the next level. You deserve the rewards
And finally, congratulations on your 1st! You have seriously bounced back and gone on to be better and stronger. Congratulations!