So much to say, So little room

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Re: So much to say, So little room BeingMe #2249860 05/30/12 07:16 PM
Joined: Nov 2008 Posts: 3,622 A AJM Member
AJM Member A Joined: Nov 2008 Posts: 3,622	RoofTop, having walked in your shoes (partially, mine was/is hostile) I can say I think you are spot on with focusing on the kids. You know what you know and you don't know what you don't know. Her journey is her journey and she didn't invite you along, but the kids need you to be and stay stable for them. I was very surprised (should not have been, but hey, I'm just a kid ) at the hostility and how it affected the kids. What happens over time is even more interesting. This tore my kids up along with my family and all before my eyes. Broke my heart to see and hear my kids suffer like that. I later dealt with the issues myself and I am VERY glad I focused on the kids. I also felt the need to be supportive because it was obviously not the same person. Know what? She is becoming the same person again and really doesn't remember much of what she did/said. Or at least won't talk about it, right? "I'm not giving her the benefit of taking ownership of her decisions." Right. Nor should you. I didn't either and I'm VERY glad I didn't. As an exmaple of how she wanted it to be somebody else but her: She once offered me sex if I would initiate the divorce. She tried to get me to hit her, move out, kick her out, etc. I didn't budge. Her choices, her actions and it must be that way for you and for everyone concerned. "is that she's going through this and I can't just abandon her" Felt the same way. Know what? That's really what others are saying as well. But eventually, you can't stop her from leaving and you do need to let her. It actually gets easier after that except for the kids. You can't win in that sense. And you can't reason with her. But you can get out of the way and let that happen. Much later you'll see more of the details and know you were right for doing exactly what you are doing. Keep your chin up. AJ "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."

Entire Thread
Subject	Posted By	Posted
So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	05/29/12 04:48 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	Jack_Three_Beans	05/29/12 09:22 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	BeingMe	05/29/12 09:37 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	05/30/12 03:26 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	05/30/12 04:14 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	BeingMe	05/30/12 06:17 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	05/30/12 07:16 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	05/30/12 07:52 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	canadianMrs.	05/30/12 08:54 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	05/30/12 09:35 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	05/31/12 03:35 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	05/31/12 07:31 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	05/31/12 09:00 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	05/31/12 10:22 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	05/31/12 10:55 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	Jack_Three_Beans	05/31/12 11:40 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/01/12 03:52 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/01/12 05:06 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/01/12 05:23 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/01/12 08:18 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/02/12 04:44 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/02/12 04:46 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/03/12 05:06 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/04/12 12:15 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/04/12 05:14 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/04/12 01:40 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/04/12 02:00 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	tested metal	06/04/12 02:24 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	seeking answers	06/04/12 08:17 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/05/12 08:56 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/05/12 09:14 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/06/12 04:55 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/10/12 01:53 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/10/12 05:28 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	kml	06/10/12 05:56 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/10/12 03:01 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/11/12 08:06 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/12/12 08:44 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/13/12 08:07 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/14/12 11:59 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/15/12 12:03 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/15/12 05:48 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/15/12 10:13 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	tested metal	06/15/12 01:15 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	seeking answers	06/15/12 02:40 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/15/12 03:10 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/15/12 03:34 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/16/12 04:59 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/16/12 01:06 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	Kimmerz	06/16/12 04:57 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/17/12 03:53 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	Queen_of_Swords	06/17/12 04:05 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/17/12 11:37 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/18/12 04:18 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/18/12 09:32 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	dl443322	06/18/12 09:55 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	dl443322	06/18/12 09:57 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/18/12 11:11 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/20/12 08:13 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/20/12 08:58 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	BeingMe	06/20/12 09:47 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/21/12 04:14 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/27/12 01:18 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/27/12 01:40 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	dl443322	06/27/12 02:43 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/27/12 02:51 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/27/12 04:45 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/27/12 05:14 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	TSquared2	06/27/12 05:36 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/28/12 01:31 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	06/30/12 03:53 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	06/30/12 02:33 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/02/12 02:34 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	07/02/12 06:23 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/03/12 03:28 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	07/03/12 06:59 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	labug	07/04/12 04:30 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/08/12 09:24 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	07/09/12 12:08 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	tested metal	07/09/12 02:49 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/09/12 08:45 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	tested metal	07/09/12 09:49 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	07/11/12 12:08 AM
Re: So much to say, So little room	tested metal	07/11/12 01:38 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/11/12 03:21 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	AJM	07/11/12 05:10 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/11/12 08:23 PM
Re: So much to say, So little room	RoofTop	07/13/12 08:55 PM

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