Journaling…… Thanks sandi2 & InAPickle your advice was great and I think I’m Getting a handle on detaching. The Long holiday weekend went fine lots done around house, went to IL’s with whole family to spend some time at lake, then kids had good time in pool rest of weekend. Friday night brought some R talk W seems to be in pretty much same place as month ago. I asked for her to forgive me for my parts in getting our R to where it is today. The conversation was calm and respectful for the most part, W seemed angry which to me is understandable, but claimed she’s not angry but just does not care anymore, seemed angry to me. I did get some insight into how she can say that’s she’s tried and tried to communicate her displeasures to me, seems that little comments like, their kids just let them have fun, was supposed to be my clue that she didn’t agree w/my parenting style. Toward end of conversation she asked why I thought kids would be sitting in room with me and get up and go ask her if they could do whatever? I told her honestly I thought It was because they believe mom will let them do whatever whenever thay want. W made comment that maybe I might need to put some effort in if they asked me, that was low and I told her so, she knew it anyway. W seems to think she has no part in what led us to here in R. During conversation I asked if she was still unwilling to go to MC, she didn’t think it would help, end of talk. Next morning first words to me where, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to cut you down last night.I accepted her apoligy. Then went on to say she wants kids to have 2 parents, wants family vacations, for them to grow up in their home. Baby step here but she must be considering MC because she wasn’t sure if she wanted to talk to someone because if they told her SHE needed to do something differently that would just p@ss her off. I got the book 5LL and have almost completed it. W’s LL is definitely acts of service, which admittedly I did not speak very well. Mine would be physical touching which looking back W spoke only just enough to keep me interested, W words not mine Im not a touchy feely person, if she chooses to give our R a chance I will have to address this with her. For now I’ll have patience until W can figure out if she wants our M.
