MrBond, You are ticking me off and you just might have a point. I read your first post from 4 years ago - your story seems to be similar to mine. I will tell you what I think is making her unhappy and what I have done or not,
I have gained 45 pounds since we were married - she says it wan't bothering her, but I am guessing she did not want me hanging around her marathon running friends looking like a slob. This year, before Dday, I was losing weight and as of now, have lost 25 pounds. I have changed my diet (eating habits, portion sizes) and am working out regularly. I have not been this weight since 2002. She complimented me on it a few weeks ago, I told her I was going to need some new clothes (no agenda, just making small talk) and two days later there were clothes in my room.
I put work ahead of the family - well, I will admit, I am going to work more now than before, if only because the house is so tense, and she is a SAHM so working from home seemed like inviting tension. More than anything I tend to get lost in my thoughts and miss out on small talk. There will be times she will say - you didn't even hear what I was saying" and while I can often repeat what she said, she is right, I was not listening actively. I think there are reasons for it and I am in IC - but how does one do a 180/LRT AND show they are a good listener?
