New Day Rising

[greatwhitenorth]

Thanks, Snodderly. You're right. It's time to turn the focus back on me. I've been weepy since my eyes opened two hours ago but need to let it go.

I got the following response from H:

"Hi W. Thank you for listening. Yes I have been working on myself slowly. There is a lot of work to do. Thank you. I do wish you peace and happiness. I am very proud of you to follow your dreams. As your life changes so much it must be hard. When I see you talk about your future you have a glow and happiness in you. Thank you for your help and reaching out to me. H"

I nice reply I thought.

It makes me sad that he hasn't acknowledged the pain I've been through or apologized for his actions, but I know that it doesn't even factor into his experience right now. He is probably right at that age where he was victimized, in whatever manner it was. I've started reading about male survivors of sexual abuse...it's all there.

That something happened explains SO MUCH.

I wish he could let me help him but I know he can't.

I wore my wedding rings to bed last night and kissed them this morning before I got up, and will continue to do so until I'm ready to really put it away. It's my way of supporting him from afar. My heart aches.