[ I've learned to cope, because one simply has to.
This story may or may not help you.
Some time ago, my XW made some life choices, which caused me great pain and anguish.
But this was not her intent. It was not about me.
She was trying, in a way, to escape her own pain and anguish.
I have to accept that although she knew the consequences to me, it was something she just had to do.
Any damage to me was, for lack of a better term, "collateral damage."
Can you see how a WAS may not be hell bent on inflicting pain on you?
We as LBS'ers have to move "ourselves" forward from the mess for our own good.
Hi Pic,
Thanks for looking in. You are so right about learning to cope because you just have to. My friends at work who know about my sitch keep saying they don't know how I can keep going.
All I can say to them is that i don't really have a choice. I've got 2 kids and money to find. I don't really have any other option but to keep on going.
I also know what you're saying about our WASs' stuff not being about us - to some extent. In my case however, I think I am not just collateral damage, as it were. There is an element of punishment in my H's behaviour, particularly when it comes to financials. I am def the 'bad guy' in his eyes (most of the time).
I am still trying to move myself forward from the mess, but sometimes, I have a crisis that makes me feel paralysed,
Reading feedback like yours helps me get back on track. Without it, I'd probably still be ruminating and stuck. So, thank you.
