I just want to scream at you "LET THE WOMAN GO!"...but what good would it do? You'll torture yourself until you decide enough is enough. Seriously, what are you holding on to? So much of your posting is focused on her and she's been gone for over two years at least. What are you holding on to? You don't have to answer here, I'm just posing the question. There's something you are getting by holding onto to that life for so long. We don't do things unless we are getting something from it. What are you getting? If you keep holding on does it mean you're not a failure yet? I know failure is a biggie for you. So what if you just said "Yeah, I'm a failure, I f@cked up, so be it, time to make a new life" Could you do that? Why hold on and to what exactly are you holding on to?
