"Regarding feral cats...have you tried changing up the food in the bowl every now and then? Maybe friskies mixed grill or ocean buffet...? lol."
Indeed, I have. It helps keep our friendly R going, but there is no romance AT ALL. Now, I could try ... again ... to flirt or whatever, but I have been rejected too many times to give that one a go (it's the main reason H's in the spare bedroom ... I didn't see any point to having a marital bedroom if there's no M, and I get disturbed on the odd days he's at home with his snoring, and my having to tip-toe when going to bed). It's fine to get the "no" when the M is going well, but when you get that negative answer when it's in the sewer tank, well ... not going to go there again.
I think I'll always have it in the back of my mind that whoever I'm with could betray me. It may not be an expected thing, but there'll never be a time, I think, that I will trust someone entirely. And, maybe that's a good thing. I will never entrust my financial health to another person, or expect them to make me happy. There'll not be the rose tinted glasses when I possibly get to a point of dating. I may even do a spot of investigating, in case, the NG is married, if there is a gut feeling of warning. I never want to be hit with a ball out of left field again. I feel that there will be no new marriages in my future. And, that's okay with me. I just have to get this one sorted out, and get myself free, either from H, or in a new improved M with H (which is very, very doubtful). I can see his disapproval of me, his stubborness to be right, and/or the good guy. He hides it well, but every now and then I catch a look, and I feel rejected all over again. But, I'm also stubborn, and I know who I am, so .... whatever.
Tonight, will be a BBQ with friends. He's at least, still connected with friends and family, and the children. Although, he was never disconnected ... only with me, but that's what kept him here ... he values his kids and friendships, which works for me. It's the only time I hear him laugh, or smile, so I organise these events as an "ocean buffet" for the "feral cat". Friskies will have to wait. LOL
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Indeed, I have. It helps keep our friendly R going, but there is no romance AT ALL. Now, I could try ... again ... to flirt or whatever, but I have been rejected too many times to give that one a go (it's the main reason H's in the spare bedroom ... I didn't see any point to having a marital bedroom if there's no M, and I get disturbed on the odd days he's at home with his snoring, and my having to tip-toe when going to bed). It's fine to get the "no" when the M is going well, but when you get that negative answer when it's in the sewer tank, well ... not going to go there again. 
I just have to get this one sorted out, and get myself free, either from H, or in a new improved M with H (which is very, very doubtful). I can see his disapproval of me, his stubborness to be right, and/or the good guy. He hides it well, but every now and then I catch a look, and I feel rejected all over again. But, I'm also stubborn, and I know who I am, so .... whatever. 