Some thoughts as I am reading some of these posts...
As I'm reading about some of the situations of people on here, I am still at a loss regarding my situation. There are people on here that are fighting for custody and how to divide different things.
When I met my W, I had lived in a small apartment that I rented. I guess I never got around to buying a house because I wanted to buy a house with my spouse. When I met my wife, she had already owned a house that eventually I moved in with her. When she asked me to move, I had no other choice to move in my my mom because at first, this was to give her space. Now, with the sitch being how it is, I know i need to look for my own place. Problem is the money issue. I have a good job, but it is going to take some time to save up enough for a downpayment. When I left my apartment, I basically got rid of everything other than a few things we used at my "new" home. After talking to L, and even though I am firm with waiting the 2 years for this to happen, I basically won't get much from W for my contributions to "her" house. I paid for so much from day 1 when I moved in with her. L said that the courts won't see it as what you contributed, they will see that you would have to pay for a place to live anyways. Basically, the half that I have paid for the last 18 months, I would only get a fraction of that, not to mention the other stuff that I bought, including appliances and mowers, remodeling projects. For god sakes, I am still paying for her engagement ring.
I really don't want to sound like this is about money for me. I would give up everything to have an honest chance to save our marriage, but how can someone move forward when they are getting the shaft?
Even though I couldn't, I would never even think of making my W and SD's life difficult, trying to take things away from them to make their life more difficult. But when my W asks me, "have you been looking for a place yet", how do you respond to that? "it will be a while before I can afford that" or just "not yet"
