Sounds like the conversation went well. He didn't have any problem talking to you because you were not bringing up the relationship and him returning home. He felt comfortable in talking w/you and that's good and he was flirting w/you just a bit. Just be careful and keep your expectations at zero.
I don't think you are going to have an issue w/him as long as he's getting to do what he wants. If you have put your foot down about him using he boat, etc., he could have gotten pretty nasty about it. He's right...boats, just like cars, do depreciate in time.
"So...about the boat. In a year and a half when step D is finished her degree he'll be able to take on the loan. He's managing to make the payments on his own. As long as it doesn't sell I don't have to pay my share of the balance." This doesn't make sense to me. If he's paying the loan balance, then he should be able to take on the entire loan now, not a year and a half from now. Is he gaslighting you on this?
For me, personally, I would have an issue w/my name being on the loan, as well as on the insurance. For me, he would either have to remove my name from the loan, refinance it and buy me out. I wouldn't want to be responsible for a boat that I am a co-owner w/my xh. But, keep in mind, that's me...you will need to decide how you want to handle the boat situation.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
