adinva, Thank you for this. I know i am here for a reason, maybe i'm just looking for the wrong reasons.
funny thing is that my W feels totally opposite about being a very controlled, thoughtful, and reasonable person. I know for a fact that she and I are both very stubborn people, but when it comes down to it, I have been beaten down for some time about the reasons for problems in our M.
i know I cannot do anything about W's actions. But sometimes I feel that the DB principles wouldn't exactly help my specific situation. As I have said in the past, NC or going dark will only make her see "out of sight, out of mind" She doesn't want to feel the guilt of what she has done.
As of 945 this evening, I will not have had any contact in 24 hrs. The last was a text, and even though some may not think it was the right thing to do, I needed to make her know "what she is doing" saying that "what the heck are you doing? what you have, and what your are willing to lose by not trying." I know it isn't DBing, but it is a 180 for me from what W thinks. She feels that I have been a weak, sniviling man the last couple months. that I should just be able to move on, that it was "only 2 years out of our lives" and we will get over it.
Marriage was a commitment for life for me and when she betrayed me, I've lost total everything in my life.
