How long is this ultramarathon anyway?

[jbnati]

^^ Well Said E

I agree Val. My only complaint is she didn't use enough smilies.

[jbnati]

E, first of all - very, very nice post. But like I told Val, sorely lacking in smilies. I expect more from you.

All in all, whether I was venting or looking for advice, I think you told me what I needed to hear.

She is conflicted because she knows you're still waiting.

This one hit like a well place throat punch. Oooh! It's not like I haven't heard this before, although possibly in a different form.

We are told to detach here on DB over and over. But truly, it's not an easy concept to grasp.

So, so true. It's a very fine line to walk. I think I've found myself being detached one day and then the next getting sucked back in. Some event will happen that will throw me off track.

I still have to be completely candid and honest with myself. There is no way in the world I would want my W back right now without any changes. Again, I have built an entirely new life for myself - new friends, new activities, and new groups I'm part of. She would have to be on board with my new life. Right now I'm not seeing it. I am not on board with her life right now. That does make it a little easier to detach. Actually it makes it a little easier to be ambivalent.

Stay strong, jb. You're going to be okay.

Thanks, E. I know I am

[jbnati]

Thanks Rick! You always have a knack for making me chuckle.

[labug]

Sorry jb, those punches to the throat are tough.

But sometimes necessary.

[Endeavour]

Sorry, jb. Didn't mean to sound so serious nor say something that stung.

But unfortunately the stuff that stung for me was the stuff I really needed to hear.

And it it makes you feel better. This is piecing -->

So by no means can I say where I am is any easier than where you are and it still might end up in the same place. Now that really requires one of these ->

[jbnati]

Sorry jb, those punches to the throat are tough.

But sometimes necessary.

Oh yes, absolutely! I think it was just what I needed yesterday.

[jbnati]

E - my only complaint was the lack of smilies.

Sorry, jb. Didn't mean to sound so serious nor say something that stung.

No worries at all, E!! None. I think it was exactly what I needed to hear yesterday. It had the effect of hitting the hard reset button.

And it it makes you feel better. This is piecing -->

I don't know if it makes me feel better? My W has almost intimated the first step in reconciliation is for her to move back.

Yes!! That's what I'm talking about!!

Thanks so much for the reset yesterday!!

[Endeavour]

Oh, I know you were only complaining about the smilies. I dropped the ball on that one.

And as for piecing, yes, I suppose that isn't exactly comforting but you can handle it if it happens. That I do know.

Your W is watching you. She has not completely detached herself so that's the good news.

The bad news is that we must all have the patience of Saints to get through this stuff and that in itself can be making.

But one day, we will all look back and realize we have learned and we have grown as people. Those who remain stuck, who don't evolve, who keep blaming and pointing fingers, those are the people that truly lose in the end. Sometimes that's the WAS and sometimes that's the LBS.

But it won't be you. ((()))

[jbnati]

Good. More smilies.

As for piecing - I don't think I have anything to worry about in that regard. I'll have to cross that bridge if I come to it.

Your W is watching you. She has not completely detached herself so that's the good news.

Hmmm..Interesting I never really thought about her not 100% detaching herself. Not that that would stop her in her tracks or anything.

But it won't be you. ((()))

Thanks, E.

[jbnati]

Might as well put some positive stuff out there, too, from yesterday. I was in a bit of a fog yesterday, but one of my customers called and she made a comment about me dancing and partying at the user conference and went on to say how much fun she had there.

My S and I rode bikes last night to get ice cream as our GAL activity of choice.

My S made a comment yesterday evening that was kind of interesting. He made a comment about me giving and receiving hugs, particularly with women at church. I assured him it wasn't any more than that, just friends. But man, I think my W's done a little damage with her antics.