@Sandi2: Thanks for dropping by my thread. I asked him several times what he thot i needed to work on. His usual answer was 'don't worry'. The only complaint i was able to pick up was that I usually bugged him, even when he wasn't doing anything! (i used to complain that he wasn't affectionate). Also he would tell me that i was far from the wife he thot i would be (i could never get him to expand that)

I don't know how to feel today. H tried to call me a couple of times this week, and he sent me a couple of emails asking for the childminder's address. I didn't reply becos he has been there several times (although not in the last three months). When I dropped DD off today, the childminder told me that H had called her and told her he would be coming around 12noon to see DD. He never showed up! this is not the first time he has said he was coming and didn't show. The minder is really upset, but I'm detached enough not to care. I will never tell my child that he is coming to see her, if he shows up, it can be a surprise to her. Better than being disappointed.

Also, today is the day he usually sends the child support. He didn't send anything last month, as he said he was out of work. Even tho he told the childminder that it is becos of work that he doesn't come to see DD, he still didn't send anything. The arrangement is a verbal one between us, but I think it is time to refer the case to the child support agency. What do you think?

Me 33, H 34
T 15 (on and off, 7 years this stretch)
M 4
DD 3
OW July 2010, IDLY - Oct 2010

1st sep 28/5/11-14/8/11 (my idea)
OW confirmed 25/11/11 (H travelled with OW 26/11/11)
I moved out 3/12/11