When a spouse ends things with an affair partner they go through the depression as if it was a honest healthy relationship. He hasn't snapped out of his mourning. I have read it usually takes 3-6 months. He isn't going to be noticing you much during this time. Thus keep working on you and improving things for you not because those changes might make him happy.
I am also glad you are getting mored posters. Always feels good to be heard.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory