I'm going to read your post about 10 more times before I respond to anything else.
In the meantime, I just thought I'd pour gasoline on my head so everyone could throw matches if they want. H sent me this email last night.
Quote:
SML,
I desperately want our relationship to improve.
Let me ask you this. I know what I need to do to make you feel safe. I need to stop being mean to you. I understand that.
And, I get that I should consult you on decisions like SS's graduation party, or checks to cover portion of that party.
What else can I do?
Do you think I should feel similarly "safe" because you didn't criticize me today? Or because you didn't dwell on the past?
I married the woman I love. Now, it's my calling to love the woman I married. One would think that would be easy!
Love, M
(BTW, when he says it should be easy, he's chastising himself, not saying I'm impossible to love. This has been said in conversation many times before.)
I'll let you all tell me what to do in response to this. Personally, I can't come up with an answer, because if he's being mean to me and knows it, what else can he do that overrides that? For example, what value does a kiss on the cheek have to me? Or a weekend away? Or anything else?
