I do understand that you are having trouble trying to relate to a lot of what others are talking with you about in your threads.
I am hoping that Brit can provide you with another perspective as one currently going through her sitch and somewhat further along than you are.
From what I understand, she really has been where you are. Trying to decide what to do, how to make it work, the frustrations...
I believe she actually was where you are... trying to figure it out... trying to make it work... but her H just wasn't doing anything... nothing was getting better...
and ultimately just giving up and leaving...
now... she really thinks that she didn't actually give it a shot...
she appears to be understanding that while her H has some things that he would be better to figure out and "fix"...
she has looked inside and understood that a lot of what was "wrong" was her own perception of what was wrong...
that... CV... is where I feel you are...
I am sorry, but I do not believe you when you say you have looked at your responsibilities in the sitch...
Because as Brit suggested above... anything that has to do about YOU changing... and the challenges associated with that... should NOT begin with, "but he..."
There remains a huge amount of "but he..."'s in your posts...
