My Story So Far. Is this even worth saving?

[timbits]

I've decided that I will go to that support group tonight. They meet on the 1st and 3rd Monday each month. This is kind of a 180 for me as I normally wouldn't ever do something like this. But, I guess I can look at it as what I have been doing hasn't worked.

I guess the problem is that I don't want what happened to be the defining moment of my life. I mean, I know it was important, but my abuser already took so much from me, it feels like giving him something more. And I'm also concerned that people will think differently of me if they know. I don't want them to look at me and see "molested" stamped on my forehead. But, I feel like the harder I fight against it, the more it impacts my personal life.

As well, I'm looking into a spa day for myself. I deserve it and I had a great month last month (and this month) commission-wise, so I feel like I earned a little pampering. There's a lovely small local spa that is a bit cheaper than others.

I'm also calling a friend for coffee. She's a gym rat and is always getting on my case about working out. I figure that it's as good a time as any to start back at the gym. I find I feel much better when I'm busy, so I'll start working out more. I ate healthier this morning for breakfast (greek yogurt and berries). I'm not focusing on losing weight. I'm focusing on treating my body right and making some better choices for me. If I make a bad choice, I'm not going to beat myself up. I just decided to choose something better this morning for breakfast.