So sorry you're going through this. I have learned that with OW in the picture you really have no control anymore. They have to ride it through, so to speak.
I read that 75% of relationships that start through affairs don't last. I'm not trying to get your hopes up but they really are not living in reality and it will set in sooner or later. It's just the waiting and hoping that will kill you. So that's why doing the GAL activities is a must.
If you haven't already, I would suggest you read through my first and second thread if you have the time. The advice from "Accuray" is quite amazing. Here's the link:
Me: 32 H: 32 M 9 yrs #1 D7 #2 S5 #3 D2 Bomb 8/12/11 H moved out 8/14/11 PA started w/H & OW in 1/12 - found out 3/24/12 Got my own place 8/25/12 H & OW move in together 9/15/12 Still married.
