H just left my place. He texted me to say he'd be by in a half hour. When he came by he wanted to play with the dog, he chatted to S for a little bit and then he said he had to keep going. He told me he had some dog food in the car so I followed him out to get it.
He had a lot of cr&p in his car and he explained he was helping GF move. He used her name which is the first time he's done that. He never usually does. I asked if she was moving to where her new job is and he said no she's moving to xxxx which is where I work. I immediately started thinking about the fact that now I could accidentally see them when I go out after work and then I just stopped and started talking about something else.
When I mentioned being out today I didn't state anything that I'd done, except about something he would have known about because a friend put it on FB. I just left it vague.
He was asking me about my stitches and stuff and then he interrupted me and said Did you get your hair done? SQUEAL!
I said no (very nonchalant) and kept talking
Then when I finished the medical update he said well you look fvcking incredible. And I smiled and said thank you.
When I was heading in and had turned around he mentioned the chairs so I turned back and we talked more about the chairs. Then I started telling him about something that happened at work about possible advancement opportunities for me. We talking about that. He was really supportive and as usual when I talk about work I was really confident and stuff.
Then I said sorry I mean to keep you, That's all that's new with me I guess.
Then out of nowhere he says "no new lover men?"
I say kinda flirty "I thought we weren't gonna talk about that?"
And he said "I was just wondering" and turned back to his car.
I turned back and said "the answers no...I'm not dating" and smiled at him really warmly.
So then he said he'd see me Tuesday and I said goodbye.
But this is INCREDIBLE. Part of me wants to say that he is going back to GF's new place right now. That he's been helping her move all day. That he's comfortable enough with the whole thing to talk about her on a first name basis with me.
But the other part of me says Men don't ask female friends if they've had their hair done, or tell them they look incredible, or ask them if they're dating anyone. I have a lot of male friends....they never notice your hair, and they don't want to talk about the men you date not until they know they're gonna stick around. okay some of my male friends have noticed my weight loss but they don't express it like that.
So 180s work, no pursuing, no chasing, no expectations. If anything I tried to rush him out the door tonight.
Did I handle the dating question correctly? I wasn't sure if I should be "mysterious" like Accuray always suggests, or if I should say WHY I'm not dating hellllllo I want to stay married..
I think that usual Brit attitude is to date and that not dating is a big 180 for me. I told him ages ago that I wasn't going to date and he said well you can't ask that of me...not right now. So sticking to it is that consistent behaviour.
