As Snodderly advised you, you're not dealing with a rational person right now. You're expecting him to give you answers to questions that he has no idea what the answers are. Even if he gave you answers, it would be unwise to base any decisions on them. I believe this generated this saying, "Believe none of what they say, and only half of what they do."
The choice to remain standing or not is yours to decide and IMHO should not be based on something your H says to you. He is being driven by emotions right now and not rationality. What he feels now could change in the next 5 minutes, tomorrow, next week, etc. You will truly know if/when your H comes through the other side and is ready to try a reconciliation. You will have a decision to make then of whether you still want to try.
Accepting the fact the most MLC's are long and drawn out will help you in letting go of your H and focusing on you and your own healing. That 'gift of time' that is talked about will help things to become much clearer to you.
If you are planning on keeping your house, please do as Snodderly advises and call a professional of your choosing to get information and the best way to proceed with re-financing. Take control of all that affects you and your children. The feeling is empowering because you handled it yourself. Have no expectations that your H will have your best interests at heart at this time.
Oh, and the patience thing, well, at least for me that didn't come easily. It took a lot of self reflection, owning my stuff, and changing the things I didn't like about me. It also took understanding the dynamics of MLC and forgiveness, not only for H, but myself, too.
