I called H all excited about what I did. He wouldn't know about it otherwise and I wanted to show him YES I can go out and have a good time, thank you very much. Enough of me sitting at home and waiting.
It is great that you GAL'd and got out of your comfort zone. The trouble is you still made it about your H.
Getting a life outside of H also means you do it whether he knows about it or not. He wouldn't have if you hadn't told him.
Why did you feel the need to do that?
Take your steps for you
When you walk a mile don't look behind you to see if he's following you.
It will get easier with each mile you walk.
There is a simple phrase around here:
DO FOR YOU.
When I first came here, and I think this is true for a lot of people, you think there is a magic pill or a silver bullet to this.
There isn't.
There is only you.
You could do everything by the book and your M still may not be saved because you can't control another person.
That is why the advice here is to focus on yourself.
It is really the best thing to do and gives you the best chance for success.
What is success for you here?
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
