GM... The "we" statements do make your head spin a little bit, I know they did me. Xh still uses them. I stopped using them a year ago.
So if Im understanding this right, is your H consistently throwing new options on the table in regards to the refinancing so it will be the best option for you both? It sounds like he can't make his mind up.
What do YOU think should be done about the financing of the house? Go for what you want and what will work for you in the long run.