Crimson, you would have had the same outcome in court even if you had not tried to get her to tell you what her idea of working on a R was. Well, I suppose if you had been willing to let her have your S all the time, it could have gone worse.....for you. But if you had not made the attempt to talk about her intentions, you could have spent a good chunk of your life playing the same game and her holding all the cards. It appears that she is guilty of the very things she accused you of doing, only she doesn't see or own her wrong actions.
I hope you will apply "dropping the rope" b/c I think that is the only thing that will have any positive results. I may have already given you my picture of what dropping the rope is, but in case I haven't, I'll cut & paste it. This was to another poster quite some time ago.
"Imagine having a rope in your hand and the other end of that rope was tied around the waist of your W. You do not want her to leave you. You are fighting for your M. So, she is pulling with all her might to get free of you. She wants out of this R! The harder she pulls forward to get away.....the harder you hold back on the rope. You have both of your heels buried into the ground and both hands in a death grip on that rope. Do you have that picture in your mind? Okay, what would happen if suddenly you dropped that rope?
She is pulling so hard with her head looking forward......that when you drop the rope....she will nearly fall over! Suddenly she is free....nothing is holding her back! She stumbles and tries to get her balance. She turns around and looks at you to see why you let go. My question to you is....what will she see?
She does not need to see a man standing there doing nothing but pitifully staring back at her or she'll just walk on. If she sees that man has stopped paying any attention to her and has his mind on something else, then she will be curious to see what got his attention more than she could. She will begin to move in a little be so she can get a closer look. She may start to ask him questions about what he's doing and who he's seeing. She keeps getting a little closer b/c she almost acts as if she's forgotten that she is no longer held by that rope and she can leave. She is free....but she doesn't want to leave now that the man has dropped the rope."
Right now, you need a break from everything, and you need peace. If you'll drop the rope, you'll have peace....and whatever happens will be better for you than her offering you a few crumbs of false hope....only to shoot you down b/c she was wanting more time with the baby. If the day comes that she wants to be with "you" (not the baby), then there just might be a chance.
(((hugs)))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
