this rocky path WILL smooth out

[zig]

thanks KD - I LOVE your parachute analogy

i have to say, i can see the panic - it seems to be more towards the surface after he bought the house and after he yelled divorce for the first time.

he seems so fragile right now

i notice him watching me every time i'm not looking at him - he's so hyper aware of me, that it's unnerving. it's almost as if he's screaming help while he pushes me away as hard as he can

meanwhile, i feel myself pulling away and letting go a bit and seeing things in the moment more clearly than i did before - in other words not getting quite so caught up in the drama as i used to be.

i'm beginning to know more what i want and what i don't want in a relationship. the picture is still a bit hazy, but the feeling of it is getting more defined.

there is quite often a trigger that we may not even notice, that causes the person to go into crises... let me say that in a more responsible way... the person chooses to panic at that time, rather than allowing themselves to go into the deeper, introspective work that a transition requires.

thanks for this - it helps me to take one more crucial step away form the sitch, and know a little more clearly that every little thing i do or say isn't all important (which i am beginning to realize is what keeps me in the panic state)

That's a good part of it in a nutshell... but it's not that simple...

there you go again -giving out tidbits, but not the whole story (grin)

so KD what's the "not simple" part - want to give it a shot:)

thanks for all you do for us here
zig