Well, we all know that I have a fear of becoming a stepford wife, right? I've only mentioned it a few million times... Anyway, I started to feel badly about just accepting the fact that my H wasn't listening to me. So, I went back to the couch AGAIN and said, "I want you to know that it hurts my feelings when you don't listen to me. I'm trying to stop talking so much, but it isn't just to make things better between us, it is to keep myself from being hurt all the time when I have to trail off mid sentence and walk away because I know you aren't listening." I just smiled politely, and walked away. No attitude, no anger at all. After that, I kept myself busy with cleaning the house. Of course, I wondered: did I do the right thing? Did I just cross some sort of line? WELL, I guess it was all good...
About 2 hours later my H came and put his arms around me and asked, "are you o.k?" I said I was, and he said, "You've been snapping at the kids." (I raised my voice slightly at my youngest son who once again developed a headache out of thin air when he heard there was work to be done around the house). He then asked, and this is BIG...if I'd like to go to his soccer game. Mind you, I have not been invited to go along in a LONG time. I brought it up about a month ago, and told him how much I miss watching him play, and that as soon as he said the word, I'd go. Well, he just kept leaving each week without asking me. I have no idea why today, but I will just be thankful for it. We had a great evening, and of course I remembered to compliment him on how he played! I'm glad I finally did something about feeling bad. I should give him the benefit of the doubt more often! Maybe, just maybe, he's not TRYING to hurt me- he's just acting the way he has for years...all those years I was feeling lonely and never saying a word (or the right word) about it!
Man, all these revelations are too much to think about!!!
