You can be civil w/him, but I seriously doubt that you can be friends w/him right now, maybe later on... The term "friends" has a different meaning for you h. It means that you are right where he left you when his crisis began and will be there whenever he wants to speak to you or have you do something for him. Friends do not treat friends the way that the mlcers do. If he doesn't like the fact that you aren't being "friends" to him, that's his problem, just as long as you are being civil to him. He can't have his cake and eat it too. If you had done to him what he's done to you, I can assure you...he wouldn't want to be friends w/you.
If you choose to email, then stick to it. Your man/child will need to learn that there are consequences for his actions. His feelings are numb right now when it comes to you, your child and the relationship.
One thing that you will need to learn and it is very difficult at first and that is to accept him for who he is today. The man you know and love is gone, i.e., Elvis has left the building. That means no expectations when it comes to him for doing or not doing something. Many times they make promises or say that they will do something and it doesn't happen because they either forgot or something more interesting comes along. His brain is pretty scrambled when it comes to thinking rationally and realzing that the world doesn't revolve around them.
Stick to the boundaries that you put in place. The boundaries are there to make things easier for you...not him. Just like a spoiled brat, he will learn to respect your boundaries and you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
