RealTime Communication feedback/critique

[Broken74]

Thanks Ro and Starsky, I appreciate your feedback.

Starksy I agree, I was way too verbose, she called me earlier and we spoke for a few minutes I kept it to business and no ILY's etc. She updated me on how things were going, wanted to thank me for the flowers and let me know she was going home to spend the night with the kids for whatever reason. I just listened and validated.

Ro,

One thing I didn't say was that she has effectively forbidden me from seeing my stepchildren. It's not that I don't want to see them, I've asked. I went around her and have asked my oldest stepson just now to see if he'd like to play tennis or grab Japanese food next week. It's not that I don't want a relationship with them so much as if she's forbidden me to see them during separation then why would that change if we divorce.

In terms of seeing someone else. She inked the separation papers. GAL to me is living a life that I enjoy living. A gorgeous woman presented herself and wanted to spend time with me. My W has been admittedly dating her affair partner. I'm not going to take any bad guy role in that scenario.

I do have a lot of work to do on me. I have been doing everything in my power to save my marriage. Often times doing the wrong things, but doing the things that I thought needed to be done. Books and lists are great but matters of the heart are not scientific nor cut and tried.

I have been as supportive as I know to be my W and stepkids through all of this and continue to be. I have given her the space she wanted. I have supported my stepchildren in the only way I know how since she won't let me see them. I am ending this relationship with my lady friend in the hopes that the tides will continue to turn in my direction and that my W keeps pulling in my direction.

Everything that I've written in the past can't be taken at face value. I have literally lost my mind at times through this ordeal. I wouldn't wish the last 8 months of my life on my worst enemy.

So admittedly I am a self serving tool at times. But if I didn't want to fix and improve my relationship with my W and stepkids (which will be much more challenging that other options) then I certainly would not be wasting my time here.

All I have wanted in the last 8 months is a chance. I am hopeful that I may be getting one sometime in the future, only time will tell.

Thanks again for your guys feedback and good luck in your respective sitch's!