Everwhere is walking distance if you have the time

[ClingingToHope]

Yes. I hope to get to that point eventually. I have my first counseling session since 2010 tomorrow. There's lots of levels to this.

Part of it is control. I am doing well in all of the things I can control.

* I've found enough extra work that I can actually pay my bills and save for future stuff. That was a tremendous worry in 09-10.

* I feel pretty good -- I've had to give up some things like playing basketball and weekend softball. But I've traded it with some great workout routines.

* I have a career plan for the future so that I'm not stuck in a dead end industry until the layoff train rolls through again.

What I can't control is XW's feelings for me or my love life in general. I can't make someone want me -- and that still hurts.

My sister and I talked about this Sunday. We both try to manipulate people and our surroundings. She thinks we got this from our mother.

Oh so much to talk about tomorrow.

Tired tonight. Umpired little league baseball and in the second game the score was 40-1. The visitors batted five times and scored their 8 run limit in each inning.

I was always in very competitive leagues and never took a beating like that -- well, until the divorce.