Well, I DID put myself through college typing. It's one of the things that I do very well--over the past few years (when writing my book), I figured out that I actually THINK better on a keyboard. This is going to sound extremely bizarre, but when things are really tough, I actually have to visualize myself typing the answers to things...
Getting back to reality...
Do you hear what your H is trying to tell you? He wants you to listen to him and validate without offering an opinion on anything. Have you read Mars/Venus yet? Gray gives some lovely examples of how men perceive our need to resolve problems when they're talking.
And ironically, this very same topic came up in MC with us too. While Mr. W. felt I had overstepped my boundaries by trying to pump him up, I felt invalidated by his constant desire to tell me how to fix my life. I can see how both parties feel invalidated by this.
Oh, your FIL isn't so different than mine. When they did call (and before we had caller ID), they used to immediate ask to talk to Mr. W. without acknowledging my existence.
This is still something I'm having to work at so maybe I can hold on to your shirttails? My big assignment this year is to forgive them. I'm still holding on to resentments and grudges for how they've treated me, their grandkids and most of all, their son. It's time to let go.
Time to get a couple proposals done so we stay solvent.
Ciao for now,
Bets
p.s. Yes, I love you guys too much to begin any assignations with your H's. After all, they're probably as idiotic as mine, don't you think? Why on earth would I want to buy more problems?
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
It's time to let go.
