Good answers Brit45 and tonibertha. Read both DR and DB and How to Improve... You're right absolutely that the last thing I want is to be pursuing. This last month has been tough and I don't want to un-do any of the good that has/may have come out of giving him space.
Thanks for your insights. It has helped beyond words to know there are folks out there who have gone through the same thing and I can benefit from what you've learned.