I know I'm here a lot...I just to talk...and vent...and work through stuff. And I'd rather do it here where people can point out my gains or where my thought process is going crazy.
OLD GROUND. So today the auction for the piece of furniture ends. I want to buy it but I also feel weird about him saying he'll go pick it up. When he was at my place he gave a lot of excuses about how it wouldn't fit and then said yeah plus I just really don't want to. And I said hey, fine no big deal. Then later I put on FB did any of my friends have access to a truck and would be willing to pick up a piece of furniture..I'd pay gas etc. I did not put this up passive aggressively. I didn't mention him in the post, I genuinely hoped one of my many friends would say yeah I could do that! After a few friends made funny jokes he commented and said hey, fine, I'll go. Now today I feel strange, do I really take him up on that offer. It's that old chestnut of does he mean what he says or is he saying what I want. I don't know if I *should* take him up on his offer.
This was a big problem in our relationship. Him saying yes to something. Whether it was a vacation or a movie or what we'd have for dinner and me second guessing it and him acting sh*tty about it the whole time. 2 months ago we discussed this in an argument. He said I can't tell you what you want to hear I'm not doing that anymore. And I said good! Because I never knew what the heck you you were really thinking and then I'd walk around on eggshells and double triple guess what you really meant because you never told me.
ARGH so do I let him be the delivery man even though he might not really want to be? Or do I just forget the whole thing? (and then am I just doing what I always did...sacrificing something I want because I'm unclear on his feelings about the situation?)
Mamma Mia this is some kinda breakthrough...this is the entire relationship personified in an ebay ad!!!
