Thank you Cadet! I have moments where I really wish I could tell H everything that I've learned or share with him what I was feeling when I left (because I think that might help some of the anger/pain/resentment that he hasn't even admitted to having)but I know it's not the right time
Part of my biggest worry is that if I don't ever pursue he will just drift. It's part of his personality. His mom even said he's so laid back he's horizontal. I forced the split and then later he said yes it was a good thing. But he was happy to drift in that unhappiness. I worry that now he has a GF he will just drift into a serious relationship (which according to him they are in), drift into living together even marriage. I know that's me thinking 8 or 10 steps ahead. I have verbalized this to him in the past and he just says it's all about timing. I worry that without any sort of pursuit on my part if/when he does have those feelings he won't act on them. I know paranoia.
I have lots of theories about his R with GF but I feel like it's pointless to even spend time considering them. Whatever the nature of their R it doesn't change the right here right now that we are not together and in his words from Thursday "if something changes in the future then great"
