Stuck in Holding Pattern 2

[AJM80]

I feel you on FB. It's a pain. I'm still friends with a lot of mutual friends and family who know what is going on. I don't think there is anything wrong with leaving your status as married until you are legally divorced. Then, who cares if it shows up on her feed.

I read through some of the things she said to you in the car the other day...just remember this. If she doesn't think she is good enough for you/believes you deserve better, you cannot fix or change her. You cannot drop down to her perceived level and you cannot drag her along with you. She has to love and believe in herself. After an affair, she'd have to take some serious responsibility and work through a lot to forgive herself and let you forgive her.

You're young, you're loved, and you have a lot going for you. It's spring, almost summer. Throw yourself into things. Join a summer league - softball, soccer, etc. Get ridiculously fit and tan. Spend extra time at work and get an awesome annual review this year. Catch back up with buddies. Find some local bands to listen too or get into the local food or craft beer scene.

Moving on and letting go isn't a moment in time, it is a series of choices. Make decisions that you'll be proud of no matter what relationship you end up in. All my best.