GREENBLUE I know you weren't trying to be a jerk. but sometimes truths delivered in the nicest way are still hard to hear.
I've had the strangest day today. I should tell you all I'm dealing with a health condition that's causing me to be emotional and fatigued. H and I were texting about it this morning when I sent him pictures of the rash. He said multiple times that he was in near tears seeing it, was there anything he could do, etc. He then joked that even though I had that rash on the plus side my abs look great.
He was referencing that pj picture I sent on Monday so I took that opportunity to say "I felt a bit out of line sending that picture ....I want you to be happy. For the record my change of heart wasn't a flash in the pan but let's not talk about all that. thank you for your offer it means a lot. I'd love to have you by my side at the appt but it's not fair to rely on you like that. Of course I'll keep you updated"
He told me again he was near tears. He had no idea it was so bad, was I just soldiering on etc.
Then he offered to go pick up a prescription for me and swing by with it tonight.
So we texted pretty much all morning.
After a mix up with the doc/pharmacy: they faxed the wrong thing, he spent money on pills I already had, they wouldn't refund him. I was sitting at work in tears.
He texted me and very firmly said feeling sorry for yourself isn't going to change anything. Don't worry about the money. I would literally spend my last pennies if it meant you weren't in pain. If you want this medication you better start making calls now.
Taking a page out of GREENBLUE's book I replied "yes sir. you're hot when you give me orders." no response But I did text him the outcome and apologized a million trillion times for all this craziness. I said that I never want to be a source of drama in his life. He replied oh well at least I'm all set if I get a skin infection.
So thoughts? how many of the 37 rules did I break? Or do the rules not apply to me since I'm a WAW?
positives: I never asked him for anything. I informed him of stuff and accepted his offer to help.
I shouldn't have apologised so much but I think part of me feels like I don't have a right to his help after all this happened. I know that his LOL is acts of service so his offer to help was his way of showing how he cares.
GREENBLUE I agree that the GF may be an excuse to avoid facing the pain. He couldn't have healed in the two weeks between him GAL'ing and meeting GF. But I'm not looking for reassurance about that relationship or attempting to trivialize it. He said many things about her that made me think he wasn't crazy about her, but I can't beleive what I hear. I think he sess it slightly different. He's said that when he stopped being himself I stopped liking him. I *think* he sees himself as "switching flavours" during the relationship. And to be honest I did the same thing. When he met me I was independent, confident, loud, interesting, exciting, I gained a lot of weight after changing careers and when I became myself again he'd switched flavours. He's said that if we were to get together he doesn't want to spend time looking back he wants us to get to know the new people we've become and build a new love story. At the time that idea made me feel like he didn't value what we had, now after reading this I understand that's what needs to happen.
