You are no more ready to D than you are to reconcile. You are BOTH all over the place. You are BOTH acting out trying to ease the pain.
Until there is not much emotion and no strong sense of urgency to file for D, neither of you are likely ready for it.
Why not: file for legal separation which includes a financial agreement and stipulates that your personal lives are none of the other person's business and physically separate.
Right now, both your actions are unstable. First you are both trying to reconcile, not wanting divorce, having sex, etc... one day and less than a week later filing D papers.
Get to a place of peace, strength, stability, non-reactivity and THEN move forward.
Sheez. Neither of you has any real clue what you want. One thing you both NEED is a lot of emotional space.
How I wish someone had given that advice to my H and me when he was rushing to D. It's better than any advice we paid for!
OMW, I hope you are checking in and taking the excellent advice you are getting for what it's worth. We all care about you and hope for peace and happiness to come your way. Take a deep breath....and take care. Ncl
