The not so Waste Land

[Harrier]

Have you tried beginning with small, physical touches? Pats or strokes on the back. Using that type of thing for jobs well done or similar? How DO you normally show appreciation of someone other than a hand shake?

Well I never grew up in a hugging/touching household, but I have no problem being hugging/kissing my relatives or kids. but I normally don't touch people. But it's not so foreign to me.

How is this non-touch behaviour different than what it used to be before your M went south?

See above. very different.

It is often stated that women don't go physical until they have the emotional... is it possible that your W is still not feeling the emotional connection and intimacy that she might need?

Possible, but she does other stuff that conveys a connection.

Are you paying attention to her ALL THE TIME? IOW, is your relationship still a matter of you and her having short moments of "togetherness" and you never make the time to just BE THERE for her to listen and validate / affirm?

I'm not sure what you mean by this, but with 2 small kids it's never all the time. I give her space to be her. I still take time to do my things - mainly running, playing Xbox. I'm coaching my kids soccer team. I also do a lot of listening to her about her work and such.

Have the two of you gone on any "dates" just the two of you? How is that different than when you first met?

No dates as of yet. She mentioned something but didn't follow up on it. I will add our support system her is minimal. She does make time a couple of nights a week to just connect her and I alone.

I hate to use are first meeting as an example. We started out as friends. We did a lot of group things and individual things. She developed a huge crush on me. I told her that I wsn't interested (even though I was) She pursued but not super aggressively.

It's not something can be replicated at this stage really.