your spouse cannot separate the person from the package they represent

wow accuray - thanks for writing that - it put a whole new spin on how to view what the WAS is doing - it's not the person they are having the affair with per se that is the issue - it is what they represent. things like freedom, control, unconditional acceptance, fun, no history, beginning with a clean slate...

all phrases that h has said to me in discussing why he should keep going in that direction.

frankly, its actually less hurtful to look at it that way - because then one can not take it quite so personally, right? (a bit tongue incheek there, just to clarify!!!)

me 46 H 38
M10yrs T 11
S10
BD ow 8/11
h filed 9/25/12


"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"