Well, Bets, as promised, I'm being a cheerful, productive Amazon! I helped a friend with a paying gig this morning and got the lawn mowed this afternoon before having dinner with friends.

I'm a little behind on my goal of rearranging the living room. Just after I posted on Thursday the lights went out and stayed out until 11 PM. I was neither able to do my computer work nor employ the vacuum cleaner in my other planned projects. Tomorrow looks good, though.

NG, I clearly remember being consumed by the pain and anger and unfairness of so many things. I was very attached to the land that P is now selling. That was a very old dream of mine and it was very hard for me to let go of it. When she decided she didn't want to live there, just the thought of that change in plans had me seriously grieving.

Somewhere among the success stories on this site is a letter from a guy who describes how he decided that he would be his WAW's best friend. That stuck with me. So when P decided to sell the land, I let go and helped her get it ready to sell. When she was packing up her stuff, I tried to make sure she'd have everything she needed. Whenever I felt a little miffed about something she was taking, I just stopped and realized that I didn't want to be petty. She doesn't owe me anything. (I can see that it would be much harder to think this if she had made a vow, but she hadn't.)

When a distant opportunity came up for her, I offered to take care of the cats. She at first said that she would feel guilty about that. I told her that she had facilitated many opportunities for me and I'm happy to do the same for her.

I feel so much better when these are my thoughts rather than anger and resentments over how she's not doing what I want. The bottom line is that she's taking care of herself. I can't claim to love her and not really, truly want her to do that. It's her job to take care of herself. And it's my job to take care of me. (Did I say that, or is it the Pia tapes talking again?)

My last DB coaching session included, among other extremely worthwhile things, an impressive display of cheer-leading that caused me to see and change some discouraging thought patterns. I feel like I'm much better able to see and appreciate and utilize my strengths. That is huge. And a huge help to my attitude. (Thank you Jody!)